What We Ate:
- Trader Joe’s Uncured Ham
- Pumpkin Seeds
- Chicken Burritos
- Whole Wheat Tortillas
Today was my first time making tortillas. I was surprised how easy they where to make. It almost has me buying a tortilla press. I think if I had a tortilla press and could make up a big batch to freeze it would be worth it. I am going to see how our leftover tortillas reheat.
Mr Rockstar woke up at 11:45PM, crawled into bed with me for a bit, then got himself something to drink and did who knows what else before going back to bed and sleeping until 6:20. Miss Princess was up at 2am wanting to be tucked back in. Miss Tomboy was up at 5:00 AM to use the potty. At 6:20 when Mr Rockstar woke up he was agitated. I was sitting holding him trying to talk to him about how today was a new day and he could earn Mystery Motivator. At which point he tried to convince me he needed a morning grab bag prize. 9 months or more ago we used to give him a grab bag (something really small like a hershey kiss) in the morning if he slept through the night and didn’t wake us up until 7AM. We haven’t done this for months. I told him if he slept through the night he could have it but since he woke mommy up last night he didn’t earn it today. Right after I said this….he head butted me and smashed my nose. It hurt, but more than it physically hurt it just crushed me emotionally . I already have been spiraling into depression after weeks of poor behavior from Mr Rockstar (and some recent fights with Hubby). I just lost it with him. I gave him a cardboard box and said to pack it with any clothes or toys he wanted to keep and he could go find a new place to live because I wasn’t going to tolerate any more abuse or destruction from him. This seemed to get his attention and he said he was sorry. I said he could stay for now but I wasn’t putting up with this crap anymore from him. I also told him sooner or later he was going to be on his own (someday aren’t we all?) so he needed to start doing his own work around the house starting with cooking his own breakfast.
We both calmed down and I talked him through cooking his own oatmeal. It was great. Then he asked if he could put some honey on his oatmeal. I said honey was expensive so he would have to wash the morning dishes after breakfast in order to pay for his honey. He said ok. He actually THANKED me for allowing him to use my honey and he did the dishes with NO complaints. I know yelling at him wouldn’t work if I did it all the time but I do need to be more stern with him than I typically am. I need to find a more effective way than what I have been doing and more effective than screaming for communicating my deep disappointment when he acts out.
Mr Rockstar did his schoolwork quickly and without much trouble. At 11:00AM we went to see the behavioral counselor. Even though we had a better morning, she could tell I was at the end of my rope. When an awesome behavioral counselor with 25 years of experience tells you they just don’t know what to do you know things are bad. We have been seeing her for over a year. She and I both remember it being this bad a year ago but at that time she thought maybe how we were handling him was making the problem worse. She has seen improvement with Mr Rockstar over the year only to see that all disappear for no apparent reason other than the changes of the season. It is starting to be clear that Mr Rockstar is most likely ADHD, high functioning autism AND mood disorder. It is so complicated all the professionals we see seem to be hard pressed to help much. The counselor advised me to go ahead and start Mr Rockstar’s new medication before I had a nervous breakdown rather than trying to wait a couple weeks to get baseline data. Today was the first day Mr Rockstar was completely off the Tenex. While we were at the behavioral specialists office, Mr Rockstar started telling me about all these bad feelings he has and saying he wants them to go away but he does’t know how. We were able to pinpoint the start of the bad feelings to when we started weaning him off the Tenex.
At 3:00 PM I decided to give Mr Rockstar his first Ritalin. I just couldn’t take the craziness anymore. Boy was that a mistake. His behavior was better all evening but he was bouncing off the walls. At bedtime he was just so wound up he couldn’t sleep. I kept messing with him and finally at 1:00 AM he gave in and went to sleep. It was not a fun evening.